


test drive

by sofiabyclairo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mention of Toxic Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 04:47:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28612293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sofiabyclairo/pseuds/sofiabyclairo
Summary: miya atsumu, despite popular belief, is enamoured by long-term relationships. it just sucks that his girlfriend doesn't and all you can do is just watch everything around him burn.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Reader
Kudos: 48





	test drive

**Author's Note:**

> yes this is loosely inspired by the joji song of the same name

Atsumu loves his girlfriend. So much. He loves the way her fingers curl around his, the warmth of her smile, the taste of her lips. Osamu jokingly says that he's so in love that it's sickening. But somewhere deep inside him, he knows that her charm is just a wall that's bound to tip over.

He's seen the way she stares at him. Her eyes are always half-lidded, as if she only wants him for pleasure. After back to back nights with entangled legs and heaving bodies, he starts to think that maybe it's true.

He's seen the way she sits with his friends. Once he brought her to an Inarizaki VBC reunion dinner and she didn't laugh once. Not at Suna's jokes, not at Aran's quips, not even at him. She smiled sweetly at them but he could see the poison dripping from her features. When they left, she was all over him and told him how much fun she had and he forgot that she ever made that face.

He's seen the way she steals his time from him. When was the last time he hung out with _any_ of his friends on his lonesome? He couldn't tell you. If he isn't doing volleyball related things, he always finds her clinging onto his arm or hovering over him or squirming underneath him.

Atsumu knows that these are red flags that are practically flapping around right in front of him but he stays unsure. What if he's overthinking it? Maybe this is normal. Maybe this is the compromise that he needed to practice in relationships. Besides, she's so beautiful, so intelligent, so radiant. He doesn't want to lose her over such minor details, he loves her too much.

_What is love truely like anyway?_

He knows he loves Osamu, volleyball, his friends. But that's different, right? At this point, the differences are arbitrary because he feels love is not the relationship that he's drowning in now. He loves her and she loves him but every time she's around, he can't breathe. It's not the good kind of breathlessness either. Atsumu feels like he's being held down. He doesn't like it but he figures that maybe her demanding nature could whip him into shape or something.

After all, the last time he told her that he felt insecure about her love, she proclaimed that he wasn't allowed to feel like that ever again because it made her feel doubtful too.

In amongst the whirlwinds in his mind, he always finds himself trailing back to you. You, the childhood friend who played pretend with him and Osamu every day after school. You, his personal tutor when exams were creeping up on him. You, the person who made his heart feel so full and _happy._

Perhaps you were love personified. But he'll never know anything of you, of your love, of maybe his love for you. He doesn't even remember the last time he spoke to you. It's a good thing that you do.

It was right before he was swept up from his feet by infatuation. He used to talk your ear off about her all the time, until he didn't. You met her once too, being met with the same poisonous smile. With every passing day, he notified you of at least one thing that she did that day and it became painfully obvious that she wasn't in it for his whole. Each fragment was minor on its own but piling it all together painted a big red flag. You hated it.

His incessant texting became more infrequent and suddenly, he wasn't talking to you anymore. Every time you messaged him, you were met with radio silence. Not even the hostile kind, just one full of emptiness and nothing. If you have to be honest, you miss it. The 'good morning' texts, the pictures he sent whenever he met up with Osamu, the secrets you two would whisper in the dead of the night.

You miss Atsumu.

So you message his twin brother, your other childhood friend that you haven't lost yet.

**To: samu**

how's atsumu, by the way?

kinda miss him :(

**From: samu**

you miss him?? D:

jks, i miss him too

his girlfriend broke up with him a week ago so not very well

You will never admit it but you love him so dearly. How could you not, he's a shooting star that burns so brightly that the image of him is engrained in your retinas. An explosion of personality, you had once kindly put it. You only registered that you felt such a poignant emotion for him when it was too late, when he had set his eyes on the girl that just shattered him into pieces.

Nothing could ever compare to the pang in your chest when you realise that he isn't and wasn't being loved the way that he should be.

Atsumu's lost all that he loves and all you can do is watch. No reaching out, no late night drives to his place for a cry, no laughter filling his empty apartment. He's drifted away and it's gonna take a miracle for either of you to float back to each other.

But then again, you can make that miracle happen, right?

And you do while standing at his front door, shivering in the November cold. You knock once and the door immediately flies open, revealing a snotty-nosed Atsumu. You'd laugh at the sight but sorrow washes over you too quickly. His eyes widen like saucers as he chaperones you into his one-bedroom apartment. 

It's not long before you're both hunched over in laughter, anger and misery all in the same breath.

"She said that she jus' wanted to test me out. What am I, a second hand Honda Civic?" he practically spits.

"Personally, I think you're more of a Mercedes kind of guy." you reply in jest. Atsumu smiles warmly for a moment before he gives you a look of mock betrayal. The warmth spreading through his chest reminds him that he missed all of this, all of you. He hopes you don't catch him getting all soft and sappy.

"Mercedes, huh? I'm not good enough to be a Ferrari?" you can only giggle back at him.

The conversation dips into silence for a moment and you feel the weight of it draped over you like a blanket. A stupidly heavy blanket. Atsumu thankfully opens his mouth to speak.

"Thanks for comin' over, I wasn't expectin' ya to after..."

"I know. In any other circumstance, I would've had every right to be mad so it helps that I'm not a jerk."

"Shut yer trap."

"Love you too." Somehow, the words held a bit too much love in them when you let them slip from your lips.

With that, Atsumu decides that he wants to watch Finding Nemo — apparently the 'best animated film of all time' — with you in tow. Who are you to say no to his innocent request?

The glow of the flat screen fills the once dark and empty apartment. The blonde finds that he's not paying as much attention to the animated fish on screen as he usually does. Nemo's not as interesting as you are, he muses. Unlike him, your eyes are fixed to the aquatic story in front of you, legs tucked under crossed arms. 

As he periodically steals glances at you, he thinks that after he heals from this mess, after he becomes more whole, he'll come to you. No matter how long it takes for him to get over his former lover, you’ll be the one he’ll aim for. You burn way brighter than she did anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> this is,,,, way too long, i got carried away. very much strayed from the inspiration source. anyway this is my note to tell you guys that i am so in love with timeskip atsumu, i wish that he would kiss me on the lips at least once.


End file.
